Author Topic: 2000 light years from home  (Read 3655 times)

ThereIsOnlyOne

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Re: 2000 light years from home
« Reply #30 on: September 23, 2017, 06:17:04 am »
Post It Note #18

A perception appeared before a thought.

Observation: Knowing happens before thinking and thinking merely describes it and claims it as its own. If knowing happens before thinking, I don't need to depend on thought. To consider it to be any other way is a misunderstanding. I need to contemplate this.

« Last Edit: September 23, 2017, 07:39:03 am by ThereIsOnlyOne »

Jed McKenna

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Re: 2000 light years from home
« Reply #31 on: September 23, 2017, 11:44:55 am »
You said: To consider it to be any other way is a misunderstanding.

I say: All thinking is misunderstanding.

Love ya, Jed.

ThereIsOnlyOne

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Re: 2000 light years from home
« Reply #32 on: September 23, 2017, 12:32:17 pm »
Thank you for the pointy stick. If that can be fully realised, a balloon will pop. Damn ...

ThereIsOnlyOne

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Re: 2000 light years from home
« Reply #33 on: September 24, 2017, 02:04:48 am »
Post It Note #19

This has been eating away at me. I look at my mind trying to understand 'all thinking is misunderstanding' and watch it struggle and pull my attention towards it so I lose myself and become the struggle. As I sit, I notice the struggle in the context of what is really happening, which is sitting (or not even that). Mind is making stuff up. There is no 'struggle'. It's the act of losing myself to the 'struggle' in mind which makes it so. I caught a real glimpse of that, just for a tiny moment.

Observation: I notice how easy it is to think about this subsequently and lose myself again and become the thinking.

As I sit here and think, I contemplate the thought 'that thinking is happening all by itself'. Is 'me' really being made up as it goes along with it apparently being believed? I need to go deeper into the 'struggle' insight and feel my way around.

My intuition indicates I need to relax into this or I will just become another struggle.
« Last Edit: September 24, 2017, 03:29:54 am by ThereIsOnlyOne »

ThereIsOnlyOne

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Re: 2000 light years from home
« Reply #34 on: September 24, 2017, 10:04:41 am »
Post It Note #20

This process feels like melting chocolate trying desperately to hold it's shape together. The chocolate thinks it's really important.

It will be left to melt.


ThereIsOnlyOne

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Re: 2000 light years from home
« Reply #35 on: September 24, 2017, 11:46:29 pm »
Post It Note #21

I notice suffocating thoughts of my 'life situation' interfering and pulling me in. It's a seething mix of guilt, fear, helplessness, self pity, responsibility and shame; denial of what is. It projects scenarios and emotions, full ifs buts and maybes. I notice habits and patterns resurfacing. I notice the trust and belief in myself wane. I become the problem. I notice it not wanting to be looked at, pushing itself into a dark corner to hide.

I also sense it as an opportunity. I need to immerse fully and pick at it, like the weeping sore it is. It cannot be pacified, it needs to be ripped out.

Writing is helping the confrontation and provides a degree of clarity.
« Last Edit: September 25, 2017, 12:00:16 am by ThereIsOnlyOne »

ThereIsOnlyOne

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Re: 2000 light years from home
« Reply #36 on: September 25, 2017, 12:16:45 am »
Post It Note #22

Contemplation once again points at the need for me to be in control and to influence. If I am to be free, I need to surrender. Completely.

There are no 'answers'. I'm looking for answers where there are none. That's the problem. It just feeds mind and creates suffering, a sense of lack.
 
Can I give in to life without any meaning? There is no meaning anyway.

« Last Edit: September 25, 2017, 01:00:18 am by ThereIsOnlyOne »

ThereIsOnlyOne

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Re: 2000 light years from home
« Reply #37 on: September 25, 2017, 01:19:19 am »
Post It Note #23

The understanding of a life with no answers provides me with a comforting feeling of relief. A sense of freedom to just live. This understanding needs to be woven into me.

The answer is, there is no answer.

It might as well be 42.

Thanks for giving me a good laugh, Douglas.
« Last Edit: September 25, 2017, 01:25:28 am by ThereIsOnlyOne »

Jed McKenna

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Re: 2000 light years from home
« Reply #38 on: September 25, 2017, 02:34:53 am »
Yes indeed... 42 it is, but keep that to yourself.

Love ya, Jed.

ThereIsOnlyOne

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Re: 2000 light years from home
« Reply #39 on: September 25, 2017, 03:43:06 am »
Post It Note #24

Thank you for the gift of 'because'. It makes complete sense.

Thinking is still staking claims to nonsense with a smug sense of achievement. 

I sense that I already know that I know everything I need to know. Now I need to know that.

I contemplate 'there is no intrinsic meaning to anything'.

If there are no answers, there are no questions. If there are no questions, there is nothing to understand.

If there is nothing to understand, I am searching for nothing. There is nothing to know.

What happening? There's a desperate search for answers which aren't there.

Poke me some more ...
« Last Edit: September 25, 2017, 04:46:27 am by ThereIsOnlyOne »

ThereIsOnlyOne

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Re: 2000 light years from home
« Reply #40 on: September 25, 2017, 03:59:35 am »
Post It Note #25

I sense that this searching will ultimately appear to have been pointless. I'm searching for understanding which doesn't exist. I need to just look harder.

I felt close to something but the gap has widened again.

It's mind making things up to get my attention and stay in the game.

'All thinking is misunderstanding' .... wake up, bozo.

If there's nothing to search for, why do I need to?

Addiction apparently.


« Last Edit: September 25, 2017, 05:20:45 am by ThereIsOnlyOne »

Jed McKenna

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Re: 2000 light years from home
« Reply #41 on: September 25, 2017, 05:27:05 am »
Addiction to thinking.

Love ya, Jed.

ThereIsOnlyOne

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Re: 2000 light years from home
« Reply #42 on: September 25, 2017, 06:50:29 am »
Yes indeed, addicted to thinking. That is as clear as clear can be. I see that ultimately it provides no value in any of this and is a charade.

Post It Note #26

I am addicted to thinking.
What is the I that is addicted to thinking?
What am I?

I've been looking for answers in the wrong place.

« Last Edit: September 25, 2017, 07:55:41 am by ThereIsOnlyOne »

Jed McKenna

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Re: 2000 light years from home
« Reply #43 on: September 25, 2017, 11:29:47 am »
Looking in mind for something that isn't there... hm.... ??? ??? ??? ???

Love ya, Jed.

ThereIsOnlyOne

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Re: 2000 light years from home
« Reply #44 on: September 25, 2017, 12:25:21 pm »
The essence of this doesn't carry across at all unfortunately. 'I' have been looking for answers, in mind, only to find there are no answers. Now 'I' know for sure there are no answers. If there are no answers, there can be no further questions. Utimately, it has invaldated all my questions as they were never there to begin with. To ask any further questions, other than those addressed to who 'I' am, is futile.

The typed statement was really addressed to 'I' as a reminder and also a pill, if you will, for addressing an addiction to thinking. It's a fence around mind with the sign 'no answers to be found here' on it. A reminder not to pay attention to thought.

Bottom line: Expecting answers from mind in the quest for truth is a pointless  exercise.
« Last Edit: September 25, 2017, 12:35:56 pm by ThereIsOnlyOne »