Author Topic: Gwen8  (Read 918 times)

Gwen8

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Re: Gwen8
« Reply #15 on: December 02, 2014, 03:06:57 am »
Dear Jed,

There is no ending to here and no beginning to there.

Very humbling....

Love*

Gwen



Jed McKenna

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Re: Gwen8
« Reply #16 on: December 02, 2014, 03:22:41 am »
 :D

Gwen8

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Re: Gwen8
« Reply #17 on: December 02, 2014, 04:59:34 am »
Dear Jed,

Selfdoubt is arising.  It's been haunting me since I was a child. I always did more than my best at shool, being a good student, more than my best in being a good daughter, more than my best in being a good wife, parent, dogbehavioural therapist etc....
because what would I be without being good at all this?

Exactly!: 'NOTHING'. I've been running from this for as long as I can remember. But it keeps showing up!! Now here on the forum as well. When I read some posts of members. It gives me the feeling that I'm no good for this. Too naive...

It's not that I like it but it's welcome this time, it's HERE(not that I'm gonna ask if it wants a cup of tea) :)

Love*
Gwen

Jed McKenna

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Re: Gwen8
« Reply #18 on: December 02, 2014, 06:08:02 am »
Too good, too naive, too this, too that, who give a s h i t. What if you are just right, perfectly perfect for this moment.. and the next... and the next.. and...

Love ya, Jed.

Gwen8

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Re: Gwen8
« Reply #19 on: December 02, 2014, 10:00:50 am »
Dear Jed,

Who gives a ****? Good question!!

Everytime I ask a question the answer is silence. The answer asks the questions, not me. That's the illusion.
So I might as well forget about them.

Sorry for the previous post. (stupid)
Whatever shows up is temporary. It's replaced by another experience in a blink of an eye. That's maybe why species
that are more adaptable to change survive better. (because in a way they surrender to change) Every moment is new, never experienced before. That's maybe why the moment is always perfect because it cannot be anything else than it is. And because there is no questioner, there is also no experiencer. That means there's only the  experience of the moment....and the next...and the next....It has nothing to do with me. It's just happening.....

Love*

Gwen


Gwen8

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Re: Gwen8
« Reply #20 on: December 03, 2014, 01:02:08 pm »
Dear Jed,

Just got a phone call from my daughter Milla. She was in tears. (She's off for a week to a forest with shool to hack and plant trees and learn about them.)She's been bullied since she was 6 years old for being different. (she's 14 now) She doesn't want to hack trees (cause there alive and beautiful). So basically she worked alone in the forest. The other children find her weird, ugly and different and she tries so hard to fit in.

I wish I was there with her to hold her hand.  Just to hold  her hand.....

Love*

Gwen
« Last Edit: December 03, 2014, 01:04:31 pm by Gwen8 »

Jed McKenna

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Re: Gwen8
« Reply #21 on: December 03, 2014, 01:29:17 pm »
Dear Gwen:

I do understand and the reality is she is there and you aren't. In addition, you are going to have to respect and accept that she has to make here own way in the world. I can tell that I am older than you and have a blessed breadth of experience and one of the saddest thing that can happen is to be born pretty and lovable and build an identity on that, only to end up an old crone. I've watched it happen many times.

She will manage quite well and is probably much smart and wiser that you give her credit for. Probably smart and wise that you or I.

Love ya, Jed.

Gwen8

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Re: Gwen8
« Reply #22 on: December 03, 2014, 01:34:08 pm »
Thank you

Gwen8

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Re: Gwen8
« Reply #23 on: December 04, 2014, 03:09:20 am »
Dear Jed,

You said : "the reality is she is there and you aren't."

(I) found  that I'm HERE and that there's no ending to HERE.
She is in (my) presence as ME

Love*
Gwen

Jed McKenna

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Re: Gwen8
« Reply #24 on: December 04, 2014, 04:49:51 am »
 ;D

Gwen8

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Re: Gwen8
« Reply #25 on: December 06, 2014, 11:24:30 am »
Dear Jed,

I'm all there is...

Love*
Gwen

Gwen8

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Re: Gwen8
« Reply #26 on: December 07, 2014, 04:44:28 am »
Dear Jed,

(My) husband is a very charming and goodlooking man. He's tall, well build, bleugreenish eyes and black thick hair. He speaks with a low voice, is a little macho, ambitious, sensitive and visual. When I met him he was a womaniser. We're together for 20 years.

I realise there has been an underlying fear of loosing him. Last night I dreamed that he cheated on me. I woke up and stayed with that feeling a little bit. I also realise that I want to look good for him. I want to be someone for him (have to be, if not there is no relation)
There is still the fear of lack of love that is probably keeping me in prison. (cause the little me is still here)

Love*
Gwen
« Last Edit: December 07, 2014, 07:12:43 am by Gwen8 »

Gwen8

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Re: Gwen8
« Reply #27 on: December 08, 2014, 01:05:52 am »
Dear Jed,

How can I loose or win something/someone when it is/was never mine? What is this thing with ownership?

How can I love someone or something when I'm love/acceptance?

How can I mean something to someone when there is only one?

Isn't  the little me something that appears as ME (and therefore doesn't have to be accepted nor denied?)

Love*
Gwen


« Last Edit: December 08, 2014, 01:24:58 am by Gwen8 »

Gwen8

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Re: Gwen8
« Reply #28 on: December 10, 2014, 05:16:47 am »
Dear Jed,
What if noise is silence?
What if the sounds coming out of the mouth are silence?
What if there is only silence?
What then?

Jed McKenna

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Re: Gwen8
« Reply #29 on: December 10, 2014, 05:22:10 am »
Nothing, or just make up whatever you want.

Love ya, Jed.