Author Topic: Have been here before  (Read 4224 times)

mindlessbutter

  • Guest
Re: Have been here before
« Reply #15 on: January 19, 2017, 01:14:06 pm »
Hello. I am back because I want to reach H/A. To be honest because I am tired of drama and tired of being attached to opinions and fears. May you assist? Regards, Kt

mindlessbutter

  • Guest
Re: Have been here before
« Reply #16 on: January 19, 2017, 01:14:51 pm »
I write sentences, reread them and feel like a fraud

Jed McKenna

  • Administrator
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 15127
Re: Have been here before
« Reply #17 on: January 21, 2017, 02:08:20 am »
Feeling like a fraud is just a stage you are going through. Later on you will realize that you are a fraud. Then less pretense to be original and truthful will arise, you will be freer and life will run much smoother. Trying is lying.

Love ya, Jed.

mindlessbutter

  • Guest
Re: Have been here before
« Reply #18 on: January 21, 2017, 05:25:47 am »
ok. oh no. H/A does not mean love, happiness + joy? it means going further? that scares 'me', 'mememe'. i'm not even a woman. But I can play with it right? Being whatever role to believe in?

mindlessbutter

  • Guest
Re: Have been here before
« Reply #19 on: January 22, 2017, 10:07:20 am »
I have no interest and I don't want to have any in the sense that nothing counts expect this peace. The way to go?

Jed McKenna

  • Administrator
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 15127
Re: Have been here before
« Reply #20 on: January 24, 2017, 01:58:14 am »
Wanting and not wanting set up desires and expectations which keep you from being with what is, as it is. It also attaches more importances...

There is not way to go and no where to go.. you are already there but are covering that up with desire, expectation, attachments and aversions... just aware and don't try to change or expect anything in particular.

Love ya, Jed
Like Like x 1 View List

mindlessbutter

  • Guest
Re: Have been here before
« Reply #21 on: January 24, 2017, 03:25:39 pm »
 Hey, sounds interesting.it feels peaceful to not do anything.  There is an obsession with going somewhere, though A longing to stay.  Something is afraid of not controlling, and nothing wants to control .  It feels helpful to not speak of 'me',  to see that it is a story. There is a lot of memory attached to the thought of me.it feels like going back to say me.The I thought seems to be a habit, but the truth is in the opposite direction

mindlessbutter

  • Guest
Re: Have been here before
« Reply #22 on: May 01, 2017, 12:24:03 pm »
 ??? I don't know what to say.  I want to put the covers over my head again.  It feels like the weirdest dream I have ever been in.  I had a release of a lot of emotional energy right now, but actually I don't want to go.so I don't know what I am doing here.  Still, I think I would rather go for HA  because if life goes on like that, I might have to go into psychiatry before I reach or when I reach TR.   can you help me with going for HA?  As I understand it, HA means making the character sane or as safe as it can be… So that the body will not get killed by realizing TR or being killed by whatever ripples of energy in reality then happen ... if you know what I mean.. I just had the  realization that my husband will stay in my life, no matter what happens.and then he called me and told me he will stay in my life no matter what happens.and all of that felt incredibly acted and staged that I felt like a fake talking to him at all.  Is it really possible for me to reach HA  for going insane? Best wishes

Jed McKenna

  • Administrator
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 15127
Re: Have been here before
« Reply #23 on: May 02, 2017, 01:01:41 am »
You sound like you might qualify for the Navigator Series. If you are deadly serious about this send and email to cambodianashram@gmail.com. Please leave blank and just put ''waiting list'' in the subject header. I will get back to you.

Love ya, Jed.

mindlessbutter

  • Guest
Re: Have been here before
« Reply #24 on: May 04, 2017, 03:50:20 am »
It is ugly, and freeing. Am I sure I want to go? If the 'I' is not real anyway, why bother? Should I just enjoy the 'I' as long as it is here? Will happen anyway... thanks for making the nav series possible for me, ill get back to you as soon as my gut says yes.

Jed McKenna

  • Administrator
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 15127
Re: Have been here before
« Reply #25 on: May 04, 2017, 05:29:42 am »
If you are enjoying just living from the I, me, my, mine perspective you would be nut's to go on with this journey. Just enjoy life.

Love ya, Jed.

P.S. The fact that you are here indicates, at least to me, that you are not so satisfied.

mindlessbutter

  • Guest
Re: Have been here before
« Reply #26 on: May 04, 2017, 06:41:12 am »
Apparently playing feels good .. I don't know where I am .. I think of someone and then I meet them 2 minutes later .. does it make sense that I or consciousness is focusing more on certain people, are these the people one should meet? I feel often like I have to say goodbye to people in my life or the attachment to them . And yes - I want more than the I thought apparently ... I feel like : zwei Seelen wohnen ach in meiner Brust .. (goethe)...i am a Little nuts ...further?

mindlessbutter

  • Guest
Re: Have been here before
« Reply #27 on: May 04, 2017, 06:44:53 am »
I wanted to call my brother, now he is sitting over there, at least it looks like him ... it cannot be though... ...consciousness likes to play me thinks

mindlessbutter

  • Guest
Re: Have been here before
« Reply #28 on: May 04, 2017, 08:46:39 am »
No one owns me and I don't own anything or anyone! But as soon as I feel the relief in that , the ego tries to attach to something again ...!

mindlessbutter

  • Guest
Re: Have been here before
« Reply #29 on: May 04, 2017, 03:40:37 pm »
Excuse my distraction from the real thing .. I guess I'll just wait .. :-\ ::) 8)