Author Topic: TRUTH  (Read 1702 times)

Stanley

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Re: TRUTH
« Reply #60 on: January 23, 2020, 01:19:59 pm »
Went straight back to the book:
Agree with us betraying our bodies and not vice versa. Okay. Enough. You know what you wrote. No more book. That’s for me.

Stanley

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Re: TRUTH
« Reply #61 on: January 23, 2020, 01:23:16 pm »
Wow. I’m feeling provoked!  And that’s terrific!  Thanks. Can’t wait to see where it leads.
No one should ever get sick??  What?  Viral illnesses have zero to do with one’s overall health except they can kill the very young and very old whose immune systems are immature or old. If you avoid contact with others then the spreading of viral illnesses goes to zero. I get that. I try to maintain that or wash my hands every time I touch someone else. 😉

Stanley

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Re: TRUTH
« Reply #62 on: January 23, 2020, 01:30:40 pm »
And of course, you yourself have used the healthcare system in your life - after TR. Mexico. Motorcycle accident?  No idea if you needed surgery but if you did that would be medical intervention.

I’m not, btw, a medical apologist. I myself avoid doctors as much as possible but it’s nice to have it there if needed.

A lot of the other stuff you espouse (too strong a word?) I actually agree with. Eat your damn veggies and fruit and good stuff. Avoid the processed sugars and carbs. 

Jed McKenna

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Re: TRUTH
« Reply #63 on: January 23, 2020, 10:44:54 pm »
Thank you Stanley. Got the comma thing, took a minute.

I get what you are saying is just what it is. I know a doctor who retired and (I'm sure he was a little unusual) his only comment was, ''I hope I helped more people than I killed''. I thought that was a wise POV. Those who think that everything appears perfect in this dream when T/R, they are not T/R. There is no perfect without and imperfect, and at the level of Truth, there is neither. Perfect/not perfect, fail/succeed, good/bad... these are all things of this dream, of duality, and totally 100% fictions. Your words are fine, they are just that, and I hallucinate that I understand your point view... and my words are equally fine, and there no such thing as fine or not-fine. Once again, all made up.

Maybe you are taking this human dream a little too seriously. I understand your responsibilites as a specialist and I am sure you have done much good and many patients are grateful, another made up condition of mind. Keep digging until you realize it's a waste of time and you give up. Every cell and neuron has to give up. Understanding is the booby prize and you are too smart to want that. One can go all the way with forgiveness and letting go. But finding a human who is prepared to geniunely forgive and let go of absolutely everything is pretty rare. My hope for you is that you are one of those.... and ''hope'' is also made up. All hope is false hope and sometimes false hope helps, but only in the dream. As the nursery rhyme goes, ''life is but a dream''.

Moby says it well:

Much love, Jed.

Stanley

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Re: TRUTH
« Reply #64 on: January 24, 2020, 09:16:44 am »
I used to love Moby.

Your words are where I am. It all disintegrates anyhoo so who cares?  I don’t. But I perform my role for my patients since they care and don’t know any different. And I have compassion for them. Mostly.

The words from your doctor friend are well received. I agree that I have for its entirety taken this “life” thing way way too seriously. And I’m sick of it. I get glimpses of something - freedom maybe? - while I’m writing and trying to destroy and it is like breathing the purest fresh air after living in a fetid refrigerator for years. It’s light and lightness and ....  is there a word to describe the feeling of having no considerations. None. ?  It’s “opening” 

I worked really hard to prop this “G” thing up and parade him around (my real name starts with a G...) because I needed to prove things. To myself. To others - also myself. I had many moments of pause along the way. One weekend in my 20’s I drove to Austin Tx equipped with some reading material and determined to get some answers from God. I was sniffing around but had zero direction. It seemed to get nowhere. There were no revelations. So I told myself to chuck all that searching for meaning or understanding crap and buried myself in the dream. But that damn tickle stayed with me throughout all these years until it exploded a while back. I was never gonna be on the two year track. No, my gestation is longer than the elephant’s. Maybe I had a harder crust?  Maybe more egoic shite. Maybe I’m lazy. Doesn’t matter. I don’t care. I’ll continue hacking away at my pace knowing I can’t get anywhere but desperate to unburden myself. And there are so many paradoxes. The things I worry about, the things I want rid of, don’t f-ing exist. I know that. It’s the thinker that wants rid of them that is responsible for their existence.

Further to go. I have no belief that I’ll ever get through this. There’s just too much here. Every day multiple examples show me how far I have to go. I get little solace in looking back at how far I’ve come. But I’m okay with it.

There’s still the fireplace and my computer and my two care-free cats after a day of work.

Peace. And thank you.

Jed McKenna

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Re: TRUTH
« Reply #65 on: January 24, 2020, 10:21:31 am »
Dear G:

Thank you for sharing that.

Everyone is playing a role... and that includes me. I pretend to be a teacher when all the time I am learning and revealing.... to myself and hopefully students. You are no different than I am, at the core. In Truth you are me, The only thing which could separate us is a thought. I am not a spring chicken, as you may know by now. I have seen and had many students come and ago... and stay too.

if I was inclined to pray, I woulld pray that in some way they gained something through contact with me. I am laughing at myself because what I really do is try to subtract from their illusion. A total paradox.  I would pray to do no harm and probably fail quite a bit. But that doesn't stop me, it has it satisfying moments for sure ... very satifying, I would think that your sense of satisfaction is quite similar. Helping a patient, releave a pain. I just work with a different kind of pain.

Shall we continue, you pretending to be a student and me pretending to be a teacher whilst knowing that any and all separation is a lie. Maybe you can turn the tables on me.,,, teach me, somethig??? I request that you write me at cambodianashram@gmail.com. I have something I would like to share privately with you. Now further.

I admire your courage.

Love ya, Jed.


« Last Edit: January 24, 2020, 10:29:00 am by Jed McKenna »

Stanley

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Re: TRUTH
« Reply #66 on: January 25, 2020, 11:51:21 am »
Guess I had to read just a couple paragraphs more.....
“ “I’m sure I’m supposed to say something about how I’m not a doctor, but when it comes to health and wellness I consider that more of a qualifier than a disqualifier anyway. Of course, if you break a bone or cut yourself or get shot or get banged up in a car wreck, or if you need antibiotics or pain meds, doctors are awesome for that. That’s what they’re good for, that’s their proper sphere of competence. There are many situations that clearly fall within modern medicine’s purview, but healthcare isn’t one of them, prevention isn’t, wellness isn’t. Monetizing disease is, curing disease is not.”

Yup. I completely agree with that. And now that I know we’re on the same page, I can more on. Phew!  Jk.

Anyhoo - I find myself looking for provocation; or at least finding myself there and not moving away from it. Turn in. Turn into it. Look at it. I am provoked because of fear. I know this because I feel afraid or embarrassed or attacked. Uncle Lala once told me that when fear comes knocking on my door: do not keep the door shut. Do not send it away. Open the door.  Let it in. And turn and look directly at it. Welcome fear.

Crazy. But here I am. Doing that. It’s liberating.

Back to my writing.

Jed McKenna

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Re: TRUTH
« Reply #67 on: January 27, 2020, 12:58:50 am »
Yup, the old uncle was very wise.... at least on that point.

Love ya, Jed.