INVISIBLE GURU FORUM

Hi Jed,
This stuff is weird; Life makes no damn sense. It doesn't take much too see that were all just reinforcing each others hallucinations like thats all life has too offer. A world by children for children. What do I want? too live my life honestly. Honestly with myself. Which is surpisingly difficult. I mean what the hell is actually going on here? This person here this image of myself is not "me" so who am I? something deeper? is there a me anywhere in there? anything? seems like alot of stuff, but anything but appearance? I cant really confirm anything but its all so damn convincing you gotta remind yourself too look. and if im not me than what the hell is anything? the world? people in it? family? there's alot of abstract things I can distract myself with but the personal stuff is all that matters. I mean a little bit of honesty thats it. nothing crazy. whats real? some things seem more real than others I'm as childish and wrapped up in the bullshit as anyone at times but it all feels so hollow so empty. Always has, maybe now I can see why. A little basic common sense honesty with myself, I am going too die. like how is that not the first thing on everyones mind always. 'dreaming of a different world with different rules' yup. how about bringing some honesty into my life story, or my perceptions or my feelings! like there all just layers of storys and ****. Its scary.