Hello Jed,
I feel inclined to write again. Haha.
Anyways, you said to find out what/who has this fear. You know what I did? I started reading philosophy.
You can bet that the topic is so hard, that I lost my hope to find what/who this fear. I asked that question again, and again, and again. I can't find anything. What it did to me is to be skeptic of anything I know, even my existence.
I do not know how to act now, what to achieve. Should I resign my myself and be contented in life or follow things(passion) that is meaningless?
But I always keep saying to myself.
It does not matter.
Hope you can help,
Sam