Author Topic: Life after death  (Read 1705 times)

Jed McKenna

  • Administrator
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 15127
Re: Life after death
« Reply #15 on: August 14, 2017, 11:57:05 am »
....and....

expelliarmus

  • Newbie
  • *
  • Posts: 23
Re: Life after death
« Reply #16 on: August 15, 2017, 05:00:23 am »
idk...it seemed like a really big problem but now i don't care ???

Jed McKenna

  • Administrator
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 15127
Re: Life after death
« Reply #17 on: August 16, 2017, 10:26:28 pm »
Now that's what I like to hear..... ;) ;) ;)

Love ya, Jed.

expelliarmus

  • Newbie
  • *
  • Posts: 23
Re: Life after death
« Reply #18 on: August 19, 2017, 12:35:42 pm »
So I realize that the number one reason that I'm not going further is that I love delusion more than truth. AndI'm going to keep stabbing myself in the back as long as that is the case.

So I've been focusing on finding out what I  like so much about being in delusion. What is to be gained from it? Where do I hope to get too? etc.
But it's just so damn tricky. Especially since I'm so comfortable in my lies and because I have a vague sense of what might expect me if I go down this road.

So do think that this approach is getting me somewhere? Do you happen to have some pointers for me to chew on?

Jed McKenna

  • Administrator
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 15127
Re: Life after death
« Reply #19 on: August 19, 2017, 11:57:27 pm »
Just stick with you love of delusion... let it burn itself out, and it eventually will. Then you can get on with your real work.

Love ya, Jed

expelliarmus

  • Newbie
  • *
  • Posts: 23
Re: Life after death
« Reply #20 on: September 08, 2017, 05:14:13 am »
So everything just is. There is nothing wrong ever. So why even do S/A or any other technique? It's just a way of saying, this is not good enough, and then chasing a bigger cookie. Nothing needs to change so why even try to do anything. I don't know the ultimate truth? Ok...that's fine. No problem. I'll just sit here and look at this beautiful wall.

Jed McKenna

  • Administrator
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 15127
Re: Life after death
« Reply #21 on: September 08, 2017, 07:56:47 am »
 :D :D :D

expelliarmus

  • Newbie
  • *
  • Posts: 23
Re: Life after death
« Reply #22 on: October 03, 2017, 02:25:42 pm »
Yesterday I thought that I would really like some weed. I didn't have any contacts anymore and no idea where I could get some. So I just focused on my desire and let it go, trusting that it will take care of itself. Or not. Anyway, today an old friend of mine contacted me out of the blue. We chatted for a while and I ended up being 1.5 grams of high quality greens richer. It practically didn't cost me anything.

I know that for a lot of people on here this might not even seem like a mentionable occurence, but I was pretty blown away. The same feeling I get when I see a good magic trick.

Jed McKenna

  • Administrator
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 15127
Re: Life after death
« Reply #23 on: October 06, 2017, 07:34:05 am »
... be careful what you ask for....

Love ya, Jed.

expelliarmus

  • Newbie
  • *
  • Posts: 23
Re: Life after death
« Reply #24 on: October 07, 2017, 06:55:45 am »
Thank you for the warning. But here is what I don't get: Do I actually have a choice or control over what I ask for? I mean, either the desire is there or it isn't, isn't it? When there is an authentic desire for something, I can't go and say No, I don't want this! Secondly, Can I ask for something I have no authentic desire for? Would I still get it? And what constitutes asking? Does thinking about it and going Yeah that would be kinda nice, count? It seems like a rather thin line to me.
 Thanks for the help. I'm still trying to figure all of this out

Jed McKenna

  • Administrator
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 15127
Re: Life after death
« Reply #25 on: October 08, 2017, 12:08:45 am »
STOP RIGHT THERE!

You WON! The Booby Prize.

This cannot be figured out, but if you want to ''get'' it you can.... as soon as you give up everything... yes, that too.

Love ya, Jed

expelliarmus

  • Newbie
  • *
  • Posts: 23
Re: Life after death
« Reply #26 on: January 16, 2018, 06:38:24 am »
Hi Jed,
I have a confession to make...
I'll try to describe to you whats going on. When I write to you, what is the dynamic? I want to be, in the eyes of the grand enlightened master, be doing a good job. I want you to pet me on the head. All I want is back in some kind of womb. I'm not going where the fear is so strong, because what it would be to much? First...before going there can be considered, I must follow and explore every other direction I could go instead. Is this how it is with everybody? Are they forced to go there only when everything else is seen as futile?
That is what I've been doing...not really. Because since I know, I am stalling. I've been spending most of my days playing video games and eathing junk food, lying around using my depression as an excuse. In between I'm still doing **** inquiry so I can tell myself I'm still...I don't even know what. Anyway, what I'm getting to is that I've lost my fire. Only a year ago I was burning. Now I'm just a pathetic loser with no reason to get out of bed. Half the time I enjoy it. Have I lost already? How do I get out of this? Willpower doesn't work. Should I just keep who am I-ing as often as possible in the offchance that something is gonna happen eventually?
« Last Edit: January 16, 2018, 06:43:05 am by expelliarmus »

Jed McKenna

  • Administrator
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 15127
Re: Life after death
« Reply #27 on: January 16, 2018, 08:22:14 pm »
I'm a little confused, what specifically to you want?

Love ya, Jed.

expelliarmus

  • Newbie
  • *
  • Posts: 23
Re: Life after death
« Reply #28 on: January 17, 2018, 06:36:22 am »
I want to have the courage to ask myself this question
 
Lova ya too

expelliarmus

  • Newbie
  • *
  • Posts: 23
Re: Life after death
« Reply #29 on: January 17, 2018, 05:51:25 pm »
lol I just re-read my post...It might not hurt to mention that I had smoked a little bit of DMT earlier that day... I suppose that's why you were confused! It seemed really clear and straight forward at the time  ;D ;D ;D