Hello, there,
I hope I didn't offend anybody with my post in any way. I also hope I wasn't disrespectful by any means. It was never the intention.
The thing is, I'm stuck. The mind wanders back and forth, pondering questions, and one of those is "why isn't anyone responding?". Maybe it is just a way my reality works. Maybe "no response" is a response, but that old trick is kind of lame. It shows me, that I need no one to achieve what I need to achieve, and that achievement in itself is a carrot dangling from a stick for me. And me, and the carrot, are one and the same - an ever-changing fluctuation of beliefs, thoughts, perceptions and the like. In other words, illusion.
There's perhaps no meaning whatsoever behind not approving my post, and maybe there is. Someone else's GOT approved, and I wonder if the Universe really wants to shield me off from every and any kind of external information input/output. (There's no external/internal, so it must be this experiencing structure of body-mind holding back on it.) It wouldn't be the first time.
I am stuck. I am in search for someone who went through the same or similar, so I can either advance or let go and die (metaphorically). Whatever. The periods of depression and anger aren't allowing me to write out, and there are only these short moments where I can actually DO something.
Is the Universe ignoring me? Am I ignoring myself? Do I want to be stuck? Is it really "I" who wants?
I don't know.
Help?
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