Author Topic: Stuck in no personal will  (Read 742 times)

silenceofbeing

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Stuck in no personal will
« on: May 28, 2017, 07:42:57 pm »
How to move from flow when the flow isn't appearing?  I had a lot of the "personal will" drop away 7 years ago, without realizing what happened at the time I went full bore into self improvement, manifesting all that bs.  The bottom dropped out again and I started listening to Adyashanti/Reading Jed's books.  I see that there is remains of a "me", but I don't know what to do in life. 

Take another job I hate to pay the bills?

Wait for the universe to kick in?

I don't know

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Jed McKenna

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Re: Stuck in no personal will
« Reply #1 on: May 29, 2017, 05:24:45 am »
Dear SOB:

Thank you for writing and you question.. hmm.. what does one do when one has no free will... ::) ::) ::)

I suggest you do what everyone else does, pretend you have it. :P :P :P

Love ya, Jed.

silenceofbeing

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Re: Stuck in no personal will
« Reply #2 on: May 29, 2017, 10:24:11 am »
I had an interview today for another car sales job, which is what I have been doing the last year and I didn't go.  I hate the auto industry and its evil greedieness but I need to pay the bills.  No direction, no guidance nand no idea what to do.  Where is intuition?  It doesn't seem to exist

Jed McKenna

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Re: Stuck in no personal will
« Reply #3 on: May 29, 2017, 11:37:05 pm »
Intuition is what told you not to go to the interview. Aren't you listening?

Love ya, Jed

silenceofbeing

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Re: Stuck in no personal will
« Reply #4 on: June 06, 2017, 08:43:31 pm »
maddening.  still have no idea what to do to "make a living".  time seems to run together now.  Bills need to be paid...  but no idea "what to do".  The old "me" has been gone for years, I have been trying to fit in and work jobs that I hate to pay the bills.  I don't know how to make money off of something that is in alignment with truth or whatever I am supposed to do
« Last Edit: June 06, 2017, 08:50:03 pm by silenceofbeing »

Jed McKenna

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Re: Stuck in no personal will
« Reply #5 on: June 06, 2017, 08:50:13 pm »
Don't think I can be of much help there.... other than to suggest patience and being open to what arises. Wanting, while difficult to avoid at times, only tends to block the flow.

Best wishes to you.

Love ya, Jed.

silenceofbeing

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Re: Stuck in no personal will
« Reply #6 on: June 06, 2017, 08:51:45 pm »
there's been some changes in how things are perceived, time seems to run together now.  the work I did before some of this happened doesn't seem to fit.  it's hard to do well in sales when you don't fit in that mold anymore. 

Jed McKenna

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Re: Stuck in no personal will
« Reply #7 on: June 06, 2017, 08:52:53 pm »
I do understand that.

Cheers.

Jed McKenna

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Re: Stuck in no personal will
« Reply #8 on: June 09, 2017, 03:16:06 am »
This may surprise you, but you are doing the opposite of what you ''should'' do.  You are trying to figure things out, to reason, to understand,etc. and that is the booby prize. Try entertaining paradoxes as often as you can... find something that doesn't make sense and just accept is, let that tension of not making sense just be... report on my desk in the morning.

Love ya, Jed

Jed McKenna

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Re: Stuck in no personal will
« Reply #9 on: June 10, 2017, 12:40:23 am »
 ;) ;) ;)

silenceofbeing

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Re: Stuck in no personal will
« Reply #10 on: June 12, 2017, 11:55:01 am »
What has my truth search been about?   Peeling away the multitude of layers of self like an onion, to reveal nothing.  The personalized me used to be located in the head, now it seems to be no where.  Driving today I just started laughing, the joke of it all.  So I am where I have always been, like traveling from A to Z and back to A.  I don’t want anything/ Time is one continuum, events run and blur together.  There is still layering to be seen through and dissolved.  All the years of effort, books, and struggle for what is here. 
« Last Edit: June 12, 2017, 10:30:35 pm by silenceofbeing »

Jed McKenna

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Re: Stuck in no personal will
« Reply #11 on: June 13, 2017, 08:43:11 am »
Yes, pretty funny. Jokes on humans.

Love ya, Jed.

silenceofbeing

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Re: Stuck in no personal will
« Reply #12 on: June 13, 2017, 08:52:56 am »
at whatever stage I am in, are commitments are bad idea? It feels like they are.  for example,  I can't get back into sales as reasons previously discussed.  the amount of ego required to do it isn't there.  I had the thought to get into the trades,  I found a trade school that will sponsor an apprenticeship and pay for everything, but it's a 2 year commitment. 

Jed McKenna

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Re: Stuck in no personal will
« Reply #13 on: June 13, 2017, 08:56:19 am »
.... and ....

Love ya, Jed.

silenceofbeing

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Re: Stuck in no personal will
« Reply #14 on: June 13, 2017, 08:58:52 am »
when you went through this, did your old ways of working drop away?  did you get obvious signs of what to do?  I've been in a rut for a long time, of what feels like no movement.  I feel like I was making "progress" for years, than most of me dissovled and i'm in some kind of limbo, like theres some movement that should be there but isn't moving me