INVISIBLE GURU FORUM

I sat down to do some of those contemplations Jed suggested. It dawned on me that the way I go about doing these things is transactional. I'm only doing things with the expectation of some kind of reward for putting in attention and effort. That basically means that I'm operating at the level of want. Often the best discoveries happen when I'm just curious about things, not when I'm disciplining myself to do it for any reason. Its basically a subtle effort to control an outcome rather than surrender.
Okay this is just a tricky way of saying I don't have to operate at the level of want.

The more I think about time the less sense it makes. Time seems like a movement rather than an aging. 
I have an image of reality being smoke drifting by an aperture. More smoke ha ha

My idea about smoke drifting past an aperture was basically a perceiver/perceived thing. In the same way that nothing and something can only be if one is there to imply the other, There's no perceived without perceiver (and vice versa). Logic demands a source but the source is the paradox because they are tied into eachother. What could these paradoxes be hanging out in other than the apparent is-ness? what is is-ness?

Imagine that it's possible to redefine the apparent reality around you. *Poof* that house disappeared because I wanted it to go. It wouldn't make much sense to everyone around and it might cause panic. If I want the house to go, and the dream needs to be seamless, every story could be rewritten to and since everyone looks to their stories for what's real to them nobody could ever know. Fresh surprise to find out this forum exists (just like the story said).... [is that true

just brainstorming a bit
"Who could possibly know anything"
asking who assumes there's more than 1 who could know anything, or that there is anything to know. Or does it? My assumption about 'who' means 2 or more to choose from. If the default was none, 'who' wouldn't be.(or would it)

The who questions bug me. Bug who? I don't know. Who doesn't know? If I could see who/what the who is there probably wouldn't be a question. If who could see you... not you? Is there anything to see?

Ok who knows how to walk? seems pretty automatic... the body?
does the body know it knows how to walk? do cells know they're alive?
what knows? what is knowing?

**** this **** its endless and i'm still nose deep in **** there's no **** end

Jed I have a question about habits. I've picked my nails since I was a young kid. The habit slowly evolved into a frequent grooming thing where I'm always looking for hairs to pull out, knuckles to crack, scabs to pick, etc. How would you suggest getting to the root of the habit?
So far I've just been watching myself when I notice the urge to do it.

Ok thank you.

Do not write on the forum any more... I don't want to be responding to foolish people and wasting my time. Or, in the alternative (he said lovingly) GO TO THE DOCTOR!

Then we can talk.

Love ya, Jed.