Author Topic: Why is life unfair?  (Read 5088 times)

khalifa

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Re: Why is life unfair?
« Reply #105 on: June 18, 2017, 09:04:15 am »
i guess i was trying to find the flow of life (being present and knowing what is there to be done, even though it can be anything it doesn't matter) , it's just i can never see or realize i have it

i get washed by some emotions not allowing me to see it because it doesn't feel consistent since it's not aligned with the freedom illusion i imagined, feels like a chain, yet i notice i can enjoy a chain or rather i go skeptic and say do i really enjoy the chain or do am i optimistic about it being deluded once more? all this context and questioning does not really give me freedom and self deception lies in either path i pick which i question context used once more instead of actually living without regrets

i'm still quite confused, i cannot give up illusion nor desire as it's too automated to keep me within, is this what i always wanted temporarily without realizing it?

also, my judgement is rather poor due to being sleep deprived, my brain's burning quite often due to bad sleep so forgive me if i start to sound mad or offsync as i realized i'm just not a 100% in the head lately but that's been like that for quite a while since the tinnitus is very persistent in not letting me have physiological needs met
Take someone who doesn't keep score, who's not looking to be richer or afraid of losing, who has not the slightest interest even in his own personality. He is free ~ rumi