Author Topic: An ACIM student, growing up....  (Read 426 times)

Jed McKenna

  • Administrator
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 15127
An ACIM student, growing up....
« on: December 16, 2019, 11:25:00 pm »
What I have learned and continue to learn from ACIM. For one its dangerous and very real. Its not a tickle fest as youve said. your going to have to confront utter futility of the illusion of you if you want to be honest, that may very well destroy you and perhaps youll never recover. Two manifestation is a word loaded up with bullshit. become an adult and realize your place in the whole thing and youll see it for yourself. Childhood manifestation is bullshit. There is a cost to everything. Setting out on a journey of manifestation has lead me to see what i'm seeking is constantly creating a loop of similar painful experiences all of which is very much to the point of this experience. Tilting that towards my desires is possible but maybe will never really be done (little me desires- alignment with YOU = true success).

After experiencing months of intense pain and depression it seems to have settled a little to a duller just feeling of futility and sadness. Were there are physical symptoms along with it that make it hard (impossible at the moment) for me to even breathe correctly (hi maya arch. of all thats fictional aka everything, most importanlty for my purposes, me)

There is also a curious feeling of not being a part of anything around me. the best way I could describe this sensation if I could even call it a sensation is that I'm not here. Yet i'm still stuck dealing with reality and trying to explain it all which creates more pain. Its a very curious thing between existing and not existing at the same time. very confusing.

Because I suspect I will never go back to 'normal' anyway, tried turning away, letting it be doesnt seem to be an option i'm trying to face the problem of who am I , what am I ? By doubling down my manifestation efforts. I am going back to the beginning of ACIM and going though it again. There are many gems i'm sure can be helpful to be. I stopped creating illusions etc. so I'm not going to just jump back into that seems unrealistic. but maybe starting over from more simple warm up techs and over the next few weeks warming up can be effective most importantly in progress in my own journey of life.

So thanks for helping me sort it all out.

Share on Facebook Share on Twitter